Thursday, January 19, 2012

Stuff I Didn't Need To Know

     I mentioned in a Facebook post yesterday how american and chinese babies sound differently when they cry and how it's just one more thing I didn't need to know. I figured I should spend a moment going over some of the other useless information I have clogging up my brain. Conflict (a blog story) will continue this afternoon.
     Originally this post was called "Crap I Didn't Need To Know", but because it had the word crap in the title Facebook would not post it to the public. It went to my wall and you could only see it if you went there. When did crap become such a naughty word and exactly whose sensibilities are we trying to protect here? My grandmother doesn't read my blog. Even if she did, crap was her second favorite word in the english language after scotch. Whatever...

Algebra - Not once in my adult life have I been asked to figure for Y. Anyone who saw my freshman high school grades knew I was not going to do anything later in life that required more than the most basic math proficieny. This madness should have stopped after the first trimester.

Most History - Famous quote, "He who does not know the past is doomed to repeat it." I don't know who said it because it doesn't matter. Sure, some of it is interesting, but I do not forsee another crisis like the Hapsburg Succession coming around again so I have no need to avoid it. Then again, I doubt anyone would ask for my advice on geopolitical affairs anyways.

French - It's a soon to be dead language. In the future we will all speak a Chinese-English-Spanish hybrid called Espachenglish that will have 40 different words for burrito but none for overtime. Besides, I can't afford to go there.

Dissection - None of this was necessary. It was naked cruelty to ask any child to cut an animal open and dig around. Maybe, if you were planning to be a vet or a doctor. Otherwise, the only other purpose I can think of is to find out which of your peers was most likely to be a serial killer/sociopath. For God's sake, it was just gross. I threw up a little writing this.

Anything Kardashian - This goes for any and all fame whores who clog or lives with their semi reality based shows. I like big butts and I cannot lie (Thank you Sir Mix-a-lot), but the last thing I need is to hear some whiny overexposed rich people complain about the trivial bullshit that dominates their lives. It just makes the rest of us as shallow and vapid as they are by watching it. I threw up a little writing this.

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